{"id":1222,"date":"2019-01-17T12:54:00","date_gmt":"2019-01-17T12:54:00","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2022-06-30T11:31:22","modified_gmt":"2022-06-30T11:31:22","slug":"email-del-17-de-enero-2019","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/2019\/01\/17\/email-del-17-de-enero-2019\/","title":{"rendered":"Email del 17 de enero 2019"},"content":{"rendered":"<table align=\"center\" cellpadding=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" class=\"tr-caption-container\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/4.bp.blogspot.com\/-jRlmnDSKGMg\/XEB50_448_I\/AAAAAAAAfhs\/y2XFLK8j1fM5Sm-q89AzsMiL0fu17AaQQCLcBGAs\/s1600\/sketchy-cobaltic-blue-flag-2009.jpg?ssl=1\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" data-original-height=\"778\" data-original-width=\"600\" height=\"400\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/sketchy-cobaltic-blue-flag-2009.jpg?resize=307%2C400&#038;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-1223\" width=\"307\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"tr-caption\" style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: xx-small;\">Raoul De Keyser. <i>Sketchy cobaltic blue flag <\/i>(2009)<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p>Querida:<\/p>\n<p>Todas las ma\u00f1anas, cuando me dirijo al aseo a obrar, paso por delante de una bandera que lleva colgada en una de las paredes del pasillo de mi domicilio desde que me instal\u00e9 en \u00e9l. Desde que me instal\u00e9 en el domicilio, no en el pasillo, aunque a veces paso un mont\u00f3n de tiempo recorriendo este de arriba a abajo, de abajo a arriba, de arriba a arriba, de abajo a abajo y de lado a lado. En ocasiones lo recorro vestido, en otras desnudo y algunas, las menos, con leotardos gimn\u00e1sticos de color azul cobalto. Pero sigamos con la bandera que, aunque no la podr\u00edamos calificar como \u00abverdaderamente inmensa\u00bb, ocupa el tama\u00f1o de dos cuadros grandes, cuatro medianos u ocho peque\u00f1os. \u00bfCu\u00e1nto mide un cuadro grande? Pues aproximadamente -para que te hagas una idea- lo mismo que la funcional estanter\u00eda Kallax de Ikea (modelo referencia 603.245.20).<\/p>\n<p>Hace unos cuantos a\u00f1os, no s\u00e9, puede que cinco y medio o seis, contrat\u00e9 a un vexil\u00f3logo para que me informara de a qu\u00e9 pa\u00eds pertenec\u00eda, pero \u00e9l me asegur\u00f3 que no era una bandera sino un confal\u00f3n. Cuando le pregunt\u00e9 qu\u00e9 cojones era un confal\u00f3n, me respondi\u00f3 que algo parecido a una oriflama. Cuando le pregunt\u00e9 qu\u00e9 co\u00f1o era una ori, ori fla, oriflama, me contest\u00f3 despacito, como si yo fuese un papagayo retrasado mental, que una oriflama es similar a un pend\u00f3n. Entonces yo me enfad\u00e9 y mientras le gritaba que pend\u00f3n ser\u00eda su puto y desgraciado padre lo arroj\u00e9 de un certero puntapi\u00e9 fuera de mi casa. \u00a1Y me sent\u00ed bastante satisfecho! Siempre que me siento satisfecho me encierro en uno de los armarios empotrados y me masturbo, pero ese d\u00eda el armario estaba repleto de gente masturb\u00e1ndose. Cuando voy corto de dinero suelo alquilarlo a automanipuladores (de sus \u00f3rganos sexuales) y as\u00ed me saco una poca pasta que, entre otras cosas, me sirve para contratar a una se\u00f1ora de la limpieza para que limpie e higienice ese armario.<\/p>\n<p>A d\u00eda de hoy sigo sin saber a qu\u00e9 pa\u00eds, estado, territorio o paraje pertenece la jodida bandera (o lo que sea). Pero me es indiferente. Cuando estoy de buen humor la llamo la confalonicoriflamapendonera. Y siempre que me dirijo a ella de esa manera suelo terminar sinti\u00e9ndome satisfecho&#8230; y despu\u00e9s en el armario empotrado d\u00e1ndole a la bandurria. La verdad es que cada d\u00eda suelo sentirme en m\u00e1s ocasiones satisfecho. \u00daltimamente incluso me siento satisfecho por sentirme satisfecho. No s\u00e9 c\u00f3mo va a acabar todo. Tampoco s\u00e9 c\u00f3mo va a acabar mi manivela, que tambi\u00e9n es mi manubrio y mi empu\u00f1adura. \u00a1Menos mal que no soy religioso! \u00a1Ni siquiera devoto, practicante o fervoroso.<\/p>\n<p>G<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Raoul De Keyser. Sketchy cobaltic blue flag (2009) Querida: Todas las ma\u00f1anas, cuando me dirijo al aseo a obrar, paso por delante de una bandera que lleva colgada en una de las paredes del pasillo de mi domicilio desde que me instal\u00e9 en \u00e9l. Desde que me instal\u00e9 en el domicilio, no en el pasillo, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1223,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center 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