{"id":2906,"date":"2011-12-12T14:08:00","date_gmt":"2011-12-12T14:08:00","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2022-06-30T11:40:50","modified_gmt":"2022-06-30T11:40:50","slug":"email-del-12-de-diciembre-2011","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/2011\/12\/12\/email-del-12-de-diciembre-2011\/","title":{"rendered":"Email del 12 de diciembre 2011"},"content":{"rendered":"<table align=\"center\" cellpadding=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" class=\"tr-caption-container\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-Iskv2Ds-t2Y\/TuYnJe80qZI\/AAAAAAAAFIE\/yBj1ccY_J4E\/s1600\/Penis%2BLandscape%252C%2Bor%2BWork%2B219-%2BLandscape%2BXX%2Bis%2Ba%2Bpainting%2Bby%2BH.%2BR.%2BGiger1973.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/PenisLandscape252CorWork219-LandscapeXXisapaintingbyH.R.Giger1973.jpg?resize=400%2C300&#038;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-2907\" width=\"400\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"tr-caption\" style=\"text-align: center;\">\n<div>\n<div style=\"font: normal normal normal 12px\/normal 'Lucida Grande'; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;\"><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica;\">H. R. Giger, <\/span><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica;\"><i>\u00abPenis Landscape, or Work 219- Landscape XX\u00bb <\/i>(1973)<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p>\nAmiga m\u00eda:<\/p>\n<p>Este es un email sobre penes:<\/p>\n<p>Siempre me ha fascinado la man\u00eda que tienen algunos hombres -sobre todo los h\u00edper testoster\u00f3nicos- de bautizar a su pene. He conocido a tipos que llamaban a sus falos desde Alfredito o Jason Eliud hasta Sutherland o Mijail; incluso fui amigo de un tipo con cara de Gollum de tercera clase que simplemente se dirig\u00eda a \u00e9l susurr\u00e1ndole sensual y melanc\u00f3licamente: \u00abmi tesoroooooooo&#8230;\u00bb.<\/p>\n<p>Poner un nombre -por muy ex\u00f3tico que sea- al miembro viril se me antoja tan est\u00fapido como intentar bailar un tango con un avestruz cojo y retrasado mental. Nadie que estuviera en su sano juicio intentar\u00eda bailar con un avestruz, sin embargo y seg\u00fan algunas encuestas, el 70 % de los \u00abmachos\u00bb utiliza un apodo para dirigirse a su hombr\u00eda y un 26 % de esta cifra incluso les dedican poemas de amor y caricias furtivas cuando est\u00e1n seguros de que ning\u00fan ojo ajeno les observa. <\/p>\n<p>Personalmente, me importan un comino los sentimientos de mis partes nobles, incluso los ataques de p\u00e1nico de mis test\u00edculos cuando, avasallados por el esfuerzo, no disponen de tiempo suficiente para fabricar semen de calidad suprema. Ellos viven su vida y yo la m\u00eda. Yo no me inmiscuyo en sus asuntos y ellos me ignoran por completo. \u00a1Y as\u00ed es c\u00f3mo creo que debe ser!<\/p>\n<p>Imag\u00ednate por un momento un tipo de aquellos en el ur\u00f3logo:<\/p>\n<p>TIPO: Doctor, Simba est\u00e1 deprimido.<br \/>\nDOCTOR: \u00bfSimba?<br \/>\nTIPO: S\u00ed, Simba.<br \/>\nDOCTOR: \u00bfSimba?<br \/>\nTIPO: Mi pene, doctor, mi pene.<br \/>\nDOCTOR: \u00bfSu pene?<br \/>\nTIPO: S\u00ed, mi pene.<br \/>\nDOCTOR: \u00bfSu pene se llama Simba?<br \/>\nTIPO: Exacto, Simba L\u00f3pez P\u00e9rez. \u00bfHay alg\u00fan problema?<br \/>\nDOCTOR: \u00bfSimba L\u00f3pez P\u00e9rez?<br \/>\nSIMBA: \u00a1OH, por dios, basta yaaaaaaaa!<\/p>\n<p>O mejor, imag\u00ednatelo en una farmacia comprando profil\u00e1cticos:<\/p>\n<p>TIPO: Por favor, quisiera unos condones buenos.<br \/>\nFARMAC\u00c9UTICO: Aqu\u00ed s\u00f3lo tenemos condones malos, lo siento.<br \/>\nTIPO: Bueno, pues entonces deme una caja de condones malos.<br \/>\nFARMAC\u00c9UTICO: Se me han terminado.<br \/>\nTIPO: Ejem&#8230;. ya que estoy aqu\u00ed, p\u00f3ngame un kilo de habas.<br \/>\nFARMAC\u00c9UTICO: \u00bfEn tu casa o en la m\u00eda?<br \/>\nTIPO: Soy indigente&#8230;&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>La kiosquera de mi calle dice que el ser humano s\u00f3lo utiliza un 5 % de su cerebro, por lo menos eso ley\u00f3 en la peluquer\u00eda mientras esperaba que le hicieran una permanente. Estoy completamente seguro de que la cifra est\u00e1 hinchada. De todas formas, me importa bien poco lo que cada uno haga con su materia gris. Algunos prefieren ignorarla, otros exponerla en una vitrina. \u00a1Que les jodan! Yo voy a intentar meter a&nbsp; \u00abcosita bonita\u00bb dentro de la bragueta. <\/p>\n<p>Saludos.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>H. R. Giger, \u00abPenis Landscape, or Work 219- Landscape XX\u00bb (1973) Amiga m\u00eda: Este es un email sobre penes: Siempre me ha fascinado la man\u00eda que tienen algunos hombres -sobre todo los h\u00edper testoster\u00f3nicos- de bautizar a su pene. He conocido a tipos que llamaban a sus falos desde Alfredito o Jason Eliud hasta Sutherland [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":2907,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2906","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/PenisLandscape252CorWork219-LandscapeXXisapaintingbyH.R.Giger1973.jpg?fit=400%2C300&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2906","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2906"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2906\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2907"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2906"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2906"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2906"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}