{"id":2988,"date":"2011-11-05T20:43:00","date_gmt":"2011-11-05T20:43:00","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2022-06-30T11:41:14","modified_gmt":"2022-06-30T11:41:14","slug":"segundo-mail-del-5-de-noviembre-2011","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/2011\/11\/05\/segundo-mail-del-5-de-noviembre-2011\/","title":{"rendered":"Segundo email del 5 de Noviembre 2011"},"content":{"rendered":"<table align=\"center\" cellpadding=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" class=\"tr-caption-container\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-1hexpLZzC_g\/TrWf3wd9LVI\/AAAAAAAAFAE\/7vSmLCA-wlk\/s1600\/Degas%2B-%2BChanteuse%2Bau%2Bgant%2B-%2B1878.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" height=\"400\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/Degas-Chanteuseaugant-1878.jpg?resize=308%2C400&#038;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-2989\" width=\"308\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"tr-caption\" style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-family: Helvetica; font-size: xx-small;\">Degas, <i>\u00abChanteuse au gant\u00bb<\/i> (1878)<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p>\nHey:<\/p>\n<p>Algunas partes de mi cuerpo se encuentran revolucionadas, sobre todo las que sirven para algo. Te cuento: esta ma\u00f1ana he ido a orinar (todos lo hacemos, excepto Jos\u00e9 Mar\u00eda Aznar) y por mi pene en lugar de salir ese l\u00edquido acuoso transparente y amarillento secretado por los ri\u00f1ones ha salido una canci\u00f3n. Al principio me he sentido incomodo, pues no es normal que la uretra cante \u00abUn rayo de sol\u00bb, pero al cabo de las dos primeras estrofas, me he tranquilizado e incluso he hecho los coros. Desconozco que es lo que habr\u00e1 pasado con la orina, pero despu\u00e9s de entonar la canci\u00f3n mi vejiga se ha sentido reconfortada. \u00a1Cuesta tan poco complacer a los dep\u00f3sitos musculares membranosos!<\/p>\n<p>Cualquier persona con dos dedos de frente (excepto la criatura llamada Frankenstein) podr\u00e1 asegurar que cantar y bailar alarga la vida, sobre todo si las canciones no son de Julio Iglesias. Como yo no quiero vivir demasiado no canto ni bailo. La \u00faltima vez que cant\u00e9, hace ya un mont\u00f3n de a\u00f1os, la polic\u00eda me mult\u00f3 con cien mil de las antiguas pesetas y mi \u00faltimo baile todav\u00eda es recordado en mi pueblo con horror y estupefacci\u00f3n por los m\u00e1s antiguos del lugar. En vez de entonar cualquier cancioncilla con voz quejumbrosa y mover el esqueleto de una forma que solo las cigalas epil\u00e9pticas pueden hacer, prefiero gastar el tiempo acicalando los pelos de las axilas, pues es algo que poca gente en su sano juicio se atreve a intentar y como ya sabes mi originalidad es m\u00edtica. <\/p>\n<p>Antes de acabar este inteligente mail me hubiera gustado explicarte las tres sutiles diferencias existentes entre cantar el \u00abCara al sol\u00bb con el brazo extendido o preparar una crema de supositorios de glicerina, pero como la vejiga me empieza a avisar de que quiere vaciar o cantar otro \u00e9xito de los sesenta, pospongo la demostraci\u00f3n para otro d\u00eda.<\/p>\n<p>\nDry kisses<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Degas, \u00abChanteuse au gant\u00bb (1878) Hey: Algunas partes de mi cuerpo se encuentran revolucionadas, sobre todo las que sirven para algo. Te cuento: esta ma\u00f1ana he ido a orinar (todos lo hacemos, excepto Jos\u00e9 Mar\u00eda Aznar) y por mi pene en lugar de salir ese l\u00edquido acuoso transparente y amarillento secretado por los ri\u00f1ones ha [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":2989,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center 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