{"id":300,"date":"2021-10-26T16:28:00","date_gmt":"2021-10-26T16:28:00","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2022-06-30T11:26:13","modified_gmt":"2022-06-30T11:26:13","slug":"email-del-26-de-octubre-2021","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/2021\/10\/26\/email-del-26-de-octubre-2021\/","title":{"rendered":"Email del 26 de octubre 2021"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<table align=\"center\" cellpadding=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" class=\"tr-caption-container\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/1.bp.blogspot.com\/-vDnK96dwxBg\/YXgrOoX_S2I\/AAAAAAAAvCI\/7j_cKPjWANgyOqYIS9Kqgd7gr7wbShRYQCLcBGAsYHQ\/s800\/b9283adb-5136-49f0-8983-03af99b1e9d9.jpg?ssl=1\" style=\"margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" data-original-height=\"540\" data-original-width=\"800\" height=\"270\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/b9283adb-5136-49f0-8983-03af99b1e9d9.jpg?resize=400%2C270&#038;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-301\" width=\"400\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"tr-caption\" style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: xx-small;\">Kiyoshi Saito. <i>Dachshund<\/i> (1954)<\/span><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p><\/p>\n<p>Te encontrabas holgazaneando concienzuda, reflexiva y esmeradamente, cuando de repente entr\u00f3 Interruptus, tu dachshund de pelo corto, y te despert\u00f3 del ensimismamiento y la abstracci\u00f3n. Tras limpiarte la baba con una hoja de papel multiusos de dos capas te dirigiste a ning\u00fan lado en particular y te quedaste all\u00ed vagabundeando durante aproximadamente 35 minutos, justo hasta que entr\u00f3 nuevamente Interruptus y te mordi\u00f3 cari\u00f1osamente en alguna parte de tu cuerpo. Acariciaste las orejas del fastidiador diplomado y te metiste en el v\u00e1ter. Desconozco lo que hiciste los 19 minutos exactos que permaneciste dentro, pero estoy casi seguro de que si no hubiera sido por Interruptus, que comenz\u00f3 a rayar la puerta con las patas para estar a tu lado o quiz\u00e1 para hacer honor a su nombre, todav\u00eda seguir\u00edas sentada sobre el inodoro bostezando, boqueando y desperaz\u00e1ndote. S\u00ed, de la misma forma que lo hac\u00edas cuando todav\u00eda no hab\u00edas comprado a Interruptus, es decir, libre, desocupada y, sobre todo, salvajemente. Saliste tambale\u00e1ndote y dando trompicones hasta que tu cerebro coordin\u00f3 un movimiento imposible y te entr\u00f3 un espasmo muscular en el gemelo de la pierna derecha, que es la que est\u00e1 al lado de la izquierda y justamente la que en ese instante estaba en posici\u00f3n de flexi\u00f3n. Mientras gritabas de dolor hacia el techo, que en realidad necesitaba una o dos manitas de pintura acr\u00edlica, notaste una trufa h\u00fameda y pegajosa en tu rostro. Por supuesto era Interruptus, ese peque\u00f1o cabr\u00f3n desocupado que trataba de jeringar un poquito m\u00e1s. Arrastr\u00e1ndote por el falso parqu\u00e9 con los brazos, como si fueras una zombi a la que han desmembrado por la cintura, intentaste llegar hasta&nbsp; el caj\u00f3n que hac\u00eda de botiqu\u00edn pero te equivocaste y acabaste al lado de la gaveta donde guardabas tu extensa y extraordinariamente costosa colecci\u00f3n de vibradores, consoladores y dildos, as\u00ed que decidiste que ya que&nbsp; estabas ah\u00ed, deber\u00edas desahogarte un rato. Mientras lo hac\u00edas, Interruptus se lanz\u00f3 encima de tu cabeza con la fuerza inusitada que produce la insoportabilidad perruna, pero con tan mala fortuna que uno de tus cacharritos, el de 12 velocidades, sali\u00f3 disparado por la ventana y aterriz\u00f3 entre las naranjas valencianas de un puesto de fruta regentado por un paquistan\u00ed llamado Homayoun.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>\u00a1Estaba claro! Interruptus ten\u00eda ganas de ciscar y te avisaba de todas las maneras que conoc\u00eda. Le pusiste el collar, le anclaste la correa y saliste al rellano del patio. Mientras esperabas el ascensor te diste cuenta de que ibas completamente desnuda&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&nbsp; Kiyoshi Saito. Dachshund (1954) Te encontrabas holgazaneando concienzuda, reflexiva y esmeradamente, cuando de repente entr\u00f3 Interruptus, tu dachshund de pelo corto, y te despert\u00f3 del ensimismamiento y la abstracci\u00f3n. Tras limpiarte la baba con una hoja de papel multiusos de dos capas te dirigiste a ning\u00fan lado en particular y te quedaste all\u00ed vagabundeando [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":301,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_hide_featured_image":false,"_jetpack_featured_image_duplicate_dismissed":0,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-300","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/b9283adb-5136-49f0-8983-03af99b1e9d9.jpg?fit=400%2C270&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/300","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=300"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/300\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/301"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=300"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=300"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=300"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}