{"id":3128,"date":"2011-07-16T14:34:00","date_gmt":"2011-07-16T14:34:00","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2022-06-30T11:41:53","modified_gmt":"2022-06-30T11:41:53","slug":"goya-rina-de-gatos-voy-tratar-de","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/index.php\/2011\/07\/16\/goya-rina-de-gatos-voy-tratar-de\/","title":{"rendered":"Email del 16 de Julio 2011"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"text-align: center;\">\n<div class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-1A94_gpbLXU\/TjVwTEg-dJI\/AAAAAAAAEpM\/h1xP1HBLW-4\/s1600\/800px_Ri_a_de_gatos.jpg\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" height=\"110\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/eldespotricadoranhedonico.es\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/800px_Ri_a_de_gatos.jpg?resize=400%2C110&#038;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-3129\" width=\"400\" \/><\/a><\/div>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: xx-small;\">Goya: \u00abRi\u00f1a de gatos\u00bb<\/span><\/div>\n<p>\nVoy a tratar de contarte todo lo que me ha sucedido esta ma\u00f1ana:<\/p>\n<p>Me   despert\u00e9 sobre las seis, satisfecho y con ansias de comerme el mundo   as\u00ed que me desperec\u00e9 con verdaderas ganas, tantas que sufr\u00ed un horrorosa   rampa en el gemelo derecho que hizo que en vez de caminar hacia la   ducha, tuviera que pegar saltitos tipo p\u00e1jaro, uno de ellos con tan mala   fortuna que en lugar de descansar el pie sano en el suelo de gres lo   descans\u00e9 sobre una hoja de peri\u00f3dico que yac\u00eda inerte -nunca he visto   hojas de papel con vida- en el suelo. Resultado: batacazo y aterrizaje   anal que retumb\u00f3 hasta en Madagascar. Mientras trataba de levantarme   apoyado en el respaldo de una silla, \u00e9sta cedi\u00f3 y me volvi\u00f3 a tirar de   bruces. Esta vez, para no volver a castigarme el trasero, ca\u00ed de morros y   supongo que el jaleo que arm\u00e9 despert\u00f3 a un mosquito diurno que   amablemente me pic\u00f3 en un p\u00e1rpado.<\/p>\n<p>No s\u00e9 c\u00f3mo, pero al   final me traslad\u00e9 al ba\u00f1o e intent\u00e9 ducharme. Digo \u00abintent\u00e9\u00bb porque   cuando giraba la llave del agua, en lugar del l\u00edquido elemento s\u00f3lo   sal\u00eda aire (luego me enter\u00e9 de que debido a unas obras, los amables   esclavos del ayuntamiento hab\u00edan quitado el agua sin avisar a nadie,   seguramente para hacerse los interesantes). Hastiado de mi magn\u00edfica   suerte me dirig\u00ed a la cocina a prepararme un suculento desayuno a base   de tostadas, mermelada y leche de soja chocolateada; mientras se me   hac\u00eda la boca agua pensando en la op\u00edpara comida que me esperaba y, no   lo olvides, a pata coja, mi rampa, que en estos momentos se sent\u00eda   infravalorada, empez\u00f3 a hacerse notar otra vez pero de una forma   descontrolada que me hizo proferir un espantoso grito de angustia que   har\u00eda palidecer de envidia a Tarz\u00e1n de los monos. Total, opt\u00e9 por   sentarme en un taburete de madera bastante desvencijado y me puse a   rezar; como soy ateo convencido y a falta de dioses que se dignaran   escucharme, intent\u00e9 un rezo a Manit\u00fa mientras trataba de asumir mi mala   suerte.<\/p>\n<p>Te cuento esto, m\u00e1s que nada, porque necesito cont\u00e1rselo a alguien que sepa escuchar sin bostezar.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Goya: \u00abRi\u00f1a de gatos\u00bb Voy a tratar de contarte todo lo que me ha sucedido esta ma\u00f1ana: Me despert\u00e9 sobre las seis, satisfecho y con ansias de comerme el mundo as\u00ed que me desperec\u00e9 con verdaderas ganas, tantas que sufr\u00ed un horrorosa rampa en el gemelo derecho que hizo que en vez de caminar hacia [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3129,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center 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